June 20, 2014
I’m still wrapping my head around the idea of a blog. How often does one post? What do I post? Do people want to read the thoughts in my head? Do they just want poetry? Do they just want “profound” lofty musings? I don’t know. I suppose time will tell… It’s weird… this feels like a public journal or diary. Memoirs. From someone not important enough to write them… so I guess that puts me in the same place as most of the celebrities who have written their memoirs… Ha! I was just smart enough not to publish and try to sell! ๐
I don’t really feel like I’m writing to anybody… cyberspace… how scary can that be really? It’s like singing in the shower – nobody is there to hear you… and here… nobody’s really reading. It just occurred to me that I may have just created the most over-the-top journal ever! A quick trip to Walmart for a spiral notebook would have sufficed… it wouldn’t be as fun though, so I guess I’ll try to settle in. If I see “follower” numbers dropping off like dead flies (all six of you!) I’ll know I have headed down the wrong path.
My idea for this blog is just to write whatever comes to mind. I don’t know how personal to get. I’m a pretty open book when I write but much more private in person. I will say this… my family is off limits after my initial “introduction” below and friends are only brought up in a very impersonal unnamed manner…none of them signed on for this. With that said…there is already a limit to the blog content, but I think that’s healthy.
A little more background so that you can understand my posts which may sometimes seem dark or sad. There has been a lot of loss recently and that is something that I am hoping this blog can help me work through in a healthy manner …I am in my fifties (dear God is that for real?) married and have two adult children who are both married. I have ten siblings…six sisters and four brothers all from the same mother and father (yes…Catholic๐). My dad died from amyotrophic lateral sclerosis (ALS) or more commonly referred to as Lou Gehrig’s Disease when I was 24. ย I was married at 18 for three years and my ex-husband, who is the biological father of my children, died a little less than a year ago. My mom died this past December from a rare form of vasculitis called Wegener’s Disease and my first grandchild, a sweet little baby girl, died last week at four days old. She was born with a rare chromosomal defect – Trisomy 18. Yes… it looks like normalcy does not exist in my family too much, and that’s okay because we have a lot of “good” abnormal too. ๐ But just in case this wasn’t enough, in the past two years I have also lost six aunts and uncles. I tell people that if I were related to me I would be getting pretty nervous! ๐
Now…after all of that…I absolutely need to say this – do NOT feel sorry or bad for me. I have a good life and am generally a happy person. I have waaaay more good in my life than any bad. It’s just a rough patch in life that we all must go through at times and I wanted to share only to give you perspective. LIFE IS FRIGGIN’ GOOD…most of the time… ๐
Ciao Amici!