There are a few things in life that we can count on. For me it’s the fact that the sun will rise each morning and will set each evening, springtime will bring the sounds of happy birds chirping as they search for worms, and chili dogs will taste just as good in the heat of summer as they do in the cold of winter. The beauty of the stars on a quiet evening will fill me with awe and wonder and the smell of the fallen leaves in October will excite me… and my favorite fragrance will continue to be the smell of the blossoms on the snow fountain crab trees in the springtime, and I’ll continue to put my nose right up on their flowers like a little kid and close my eyes and drink in the bouquet. These things are some of the beauty in life that I can count on.
Of course there is always the flip side. Among all of these beautiful things (including the chili dogs! 😉 …can you tell I love chili dogs?) there will be times of genuine trial for us. We each have our own stories that we bring forward into the storms and – these stories will have changed and evolved immensely by the time the storms have passed.
I think that in the aftermath it takes time to pull all of the strands of broken threads back together and make sense of the new mosaic our lives have become. Sometimes we’re happy with how the tapestry forms and sometimes we are not, but we have choices. So very much is beyond our control. It’s taken me a long time to realize that eventually I have the choice to be happy. I say “eventually” only because I know that sometimes you really don’t have that choice depending on what has happened and how tragic and traumatizing. But I do believe that the smoke clears and the dust settles and life moves forward.
I worried a lot during the “storms” that these past two years have brought. I had so many emotions that I didn’t know what to do with…where to put. A huge fear that I had trouble quelling was – what if, after I get through the grieving…I find that I have changed so much that I don’t recognize myself…or like myself? What if the angers remain and the hard edges remain sharp? I confided this fear to a friend one day, and my friend gave me excellent advice. To paraphrase…Trust “you”. Trust the core of who you are…that will not change. Life circumstances change and you ride through the storms but you remain the person that you are.
This helped me so much and now that I feel the storms are subsiding I look around and I do see rainbows. Many of them. I believe their beauty is much more precious and their colors much more vivid as a result of the storms that created them. I am blessed.
Ciao Amici! ❤️