Today has been interesting so far. Within myself. Physically I am anxious and feel the tears welling up inside but emotionally I want to take the reigns. So…I’ll write because it helps. This will probably end up being so much babble but that’s ok.
I want to talk about eyes. Eyes are my favorite body part in people. I think that you can tell so much by the eyes. There’s a quote I read years ago that has stuck with me because there’s a lot of truth to it… “If the eyes had no tears, the soul would have no rainbow.” I love this. Sometimes when I have a good cry I feel better right away, but that’s usually when there’s someone on the other end of my tears helping me to make sense of them. Other times, it takes a while and I have to sit with the sad. And that’s ok. Doesn’t mean I like it but it’s ok. Eventually the sad goes away. I’m really getting off base here and I promise I’ll get back to the eyes…but I was just remembering another quote I saw recently from Ernest Hemingway. Actually two. But the one I wanted to share now is this… “Happiness in intelligent people is the rarest thing I know.” Please don’t be offended if you’re a happy person! I’m not saying you are unintelligent. 😊 I think if I were to try to “improve” on Hemmingway’s thought I would replace the word “intelligent” with a personality trait that was not identified until the 90s and that is this – “highly sensitive person” (HSP). (HSPs just tend to be highly intelligent too 😉)
In my quest to find out why what I’m starting to refer to as “the sad”, comes up so often (if you know me well enough you know I’m always looking for “whys”…but I’m starting to realize the “whys” don’t always matter and that’s a good thing.) I came across really good information on this trait and I see myself written all over it in most areas…not all but absolutely most. Does it change things? No. Does it help me to understand – which in turn helps me? Absolutely yes. I mentioned in a blog last year that I saw a therapist once (back in the 80s – pre “HSP”) that told me that she could see that when bad things happened to me – things that most people worked through quicker and differently, that instead they would hit me like a Mack truck and therefore of course, would be much harder on me emotionally. Here’s what I’m finding out and I will share in case it helps someone reading this:
HSPs studied by neuroscientists showed differences in brain activity in how they processed information given to them – which shows they are hard-wired differently (so it’s not something we have control over).
They take longer making decisions and need more “alone time” to think.
They are born with a heightened sensitivity meter (which explains where I am going with the eyes later). They are sensitive to light, noise and often stimulants in coffee. They are more sensitive to both internal and external stimuli.
They have a complex inner life and an active imagination. (Ummm…yeah) 😉
They hurt deeply and love deeply and tend to be creatively gifted whether in music, writing or painting/drawing and in expressing what is inside of them.
They are easily overwhelmed by their feelings. They have a lot of “self-protection” tendencies including projection and minimizing because there is often a fear of rejection associated with this trait.
But! A lot of species have the same hard wired brain and were leaders (such as wolves) because of their heightened senses and self preservation tendencies. It’s not a bad thing to be – it just is. One of the articles I read said that HSPs fare very well when they exercise and because they tend to be selective with who they spend their time with due to their innate sense of what their own needs are.
So definitely a lot of information but it makes so much make so much sense…(like why when I was a little girl setting the table for dinner, I worried that the fork might have hurt feelings if it was set down last…Hahahaah!)
Anyway…yes…a lot of babble but I think I’ll save the eyes for later because I tired myself out and probably you too!
Oh! I feel better too! 😊